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wiews from illness

September 28, 2012

older  posts explaining someone something:

September, the9th, 2012. SMILE             Walking and fields

Servant of Lord

2011

(   from chapter two of  “Living touches” )

September, the9th, 2012. SMILE             Walking and fields
1:50 donknow how, i wish to say something more…about the  toughts, it is very dangerous for me couse i went to hospital when i ‘ve  said  that sentence for the first time. and now im talking. it heals me. sorry for disturbing. i don want  to speak abot my brain, but about  what i see and what i know, looking people …they are not ill, but somehow i have  something like soul experience and many of us have it, only  medicines know that, i suppose. maybe it is interesting. there are fields, many of them and each has it purpose, in mind. there is a place for Love, there is a place for reality, then the place for world, a place for  myself…etc. that place for reality is very elastic. but im glad. i cant think only in one field, there are many and it depence of what are you living and not what do you think, thinking is a part of living. to be psyhotic doesn’t mean be  not-worthy, psyco has different look on everything. you can hide very much of it and you can take a medicine against pain or alchocol or you can be a dictator or something. but if you are not ill, you can’t acting like you are. “healty” does not know what ill knows. egz. if  you have arms, you can hide one. but if you don’t have arms you don’t know how it is. it is very normal for religion., for Christ; He never said a word about pacients , he spoke with them. when He says that blind can see, and  criple can walk…He didn’t mean realy, but He is speaking of a heart blindness. and THAT is a miracle, specialy for Saint John who baptized. and it goes like this: the Spirit is on me… to bring the joy news to the poor, to get free people, to say the Year of Lord etc. only joy, joy, joy. not heal, ecsept  heartbreaks. and the heart you cannot brake, if you can, then my heart has that fields without connection, but i could do only a few things and get introvert and stop talking and work, work, work, and nobody will say that im ill  or mad. i know that others do not have so many fields or they dont know that thay have them. they are not developed. so, we know or think that a blind man can hear better than one who see. and that is it.

im not guilty couse i cant connect my fields, they long for answer in the same way from the world arround.
the field for reality has fields for children, for women, for men, for
arroundness and estetic, for voices. the field of voices has people voices, for voices that are not named,, voices of nature, voices of  Evil, voices which are mine, voices of what are you see, voices for  dreams and of course voice , not voice but understanding  for Gods words. that is all me. it is easy to believe that that fields are in connection., in relations. i dont see people like something what they have and what is very easy to see. i need to see people in some fields of mine. it is not enough to look at the eyes, for me it is very important to hear people and to feel them is not important at all. people dont lie as much as they say. they believe what are they talk.. so, in the heart they do not know what is happening on their mouth. it is very important to make that connection, to learn how to talk clearly because other people dont understand, very rare, what they realy mean. to take a walk means:1. i go for a walk, 2. i dont want to be here any more, 3. get away from me, 4. i am going to buy a cigarettes, 5. i will not come back, 6. i will take a drive, 7. am back very soon, 8. do you love me?, 9.i dont want to get the room in order, i dont want to cook, 10. i need a fresh air, etc. what does it realy mean ” to take a walk” ? i know one: 1. would you like to take a walk with me and eat something like fast food? that is what does it mean. 3:17

that’s it

im learning about word pad, philosophy and that virtual english, someone said : write to learn how to write

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