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To Feel Or Not To Feel

October 8, 2012


Oct, 07./08.2012.

About midnight        To feel or not to feel


Hi,  I want to talk about  something, about feelings. Mostly I do not feel the Lord . Once, in  contemplation, I said that for God you do not need  to feel something for Him. Apostoles had feelings  for Jesus, that’s for sure. What were they going through, it must be a lot of mixed  ideas and feelings,  but only one lasted the whole time: they were in the Kingdom of Heaven. That is  what I mean, I feel now a joy, piece and happyness. It is not only toward the Lord. It is you again.

What on the earth  are you doing now?

Would like to say that we are in the same, holy place and I think that place is a Virgin Mary, where Jesus is preparing us  room, a house which is the  temple of us both together;

Do  you  remember, that is the place I have mentioned, place where we  are in relation, only the two of us, in front of God.

It is all because the Lord decided to give me something I probably want very much, but try to let His will be done, didn’t ask Him, didn’t ask anybody for that, only I prayed together with others, for you, for your job, for you to do the good blessy job like you have always did.

Did you find  a girl friend? Are you nostalgic…if you have time to think of home. Do you celebrating Oct, the eighth?

Do you feel? Oh, yes, feelings. Well,  people have much of feelings for Mary, it is like an opium. Gattcha, didn’t I ?

That’s what I asked Her, long time ago. I remember it very well, I wrote it in my essay. You know what  I am thinking now? I think  you have asked the same thing…

Oh, burn his flame, dear Mary, burn him  to know  what condition I am in.


Want to say, a human love  for Jesus, who is Love, is not the same condition like love among people, between lovers, even it is not like love for  Mary.  In the another words, love of human for Jesus has no feelings mostly. That is with me. When I pray, I rarely feel. When He gives me the answer, I feel, like I feel for the first time, it  is always  the first love. I  am born again,  what is the best sicureness  that I  am not mistaking, that’s Life who gave me hallos from you. Because I feel you like I felt twice when you  were gone. It is all because  the prayers are  all right. People do not know what to ask and how to pray.


I didn’t feel like now when we were together; I had no time for feelings, I wanted to be concentrate on every your word in connection  with Jesus all time long, it was a big effort to me.

I knew, if  I only pray and do the things I ussually do, that God will send me your message, if it is His will. Now, I know for sure how to behaive.


Love is a  Rock of fidelity, trusting, a big credit human gets  from our  Father. It is a bussyness,  a job, Christians have a lot of job to do. It is not their job only to be feeded and happy  and healthy. There is more. It needs more to come in condition of loving  connection with Jesus. That asks more then one human, must be two at least, in front and in the name of Jesus, the Lord. It have to be more and more people, training to find a connection like this. What is happening in front of Mary is a little bit different. Maybe because She has some kind of passive role, or duty than Christ Himself. It must be a difference, my mind and common sense are working now: it have to be a difference. There is one: Mary is like a magnetic call for every person on this world  ( the other is in Heaven )  and if a human always stay   only with Her, can happen that he never see Jesus. Jesus asks of human some things. Mary does  not ask. Jesus learn humans, Mary  calls people.  But God does  not call every human who is in love with Mary. Jesus knocks, but  does not opening the door of human’s. Jesus ask of human to open himself to Him and Mary does not, she says us to pray,  to do what Jesus says,  but she does not telling what is that Jesus says and He speaks every person on the ear, on the mouth, in the heart, too.


Well,I still feel.  You are happy because of  me. Your will is done. Thanks for giving me a little time and credit, a much of credit,but  you knew everything, I saw your face when we  met for the last time, I sow that you are satisfied and that could not be if you did not know that everything  will be perfect like it was at first glance, exactly that happened.

And that all could not be without Father’s will in the piece, in the glory of Jesus Christ in the Holy Spirit.100


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